Reader Series: 'The Ersatz Elevator,' Lemony Snicket

This is the sixth post in a series leading up to the premiere of Netflix's 'A Series of Unfortunate Events' on January 13, 2017. The series will cover each of the 13 books and 'Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography.' Be warned: there are spoilers ahead.



Orphans are in this season. Esme Squalor, and her husband Jerome, are the Baudelaires' new guardians. Life at 666 Dark Avenue means a penthouse apartment, an affinity for fashionable fads, and dining out at places with waiters dressed like fish. Unfortunately, this building hides a secret passage in an elevator shaft, a cage with two triplets, and a questionable auction with Lot VFD.


Bizarrely, The Ersatz Elevator is the most normal book of the series. There is a steady home, a disorganized but generally interested adoptive couple, new clothes, and a generally non-stressful environment. Of course, that changes. But the point is that this was a promising home until Esme Squalor's true nature was revealed. Esme's villainy wasn't that surprising - she felt Cruella de Vil from the beginning. However, with the kindness of Jerome, as readers, we had some faint hope. It's an unfortunate truth that we often see mismatched couples, specifically a kind person with someone who doesn't seem to appreciate them or deserve them.



Like I said, The Ersatz Elevator is an unusual book in its normalcy. Sure, the Baudelaires fall onto a net in an elevator shaft. Yes, Sunny uses her teeth to climb up a while. And, yes, the two triplets are locked in a cage at the bottom of said elevator shaft. And did I mention those fish waiters? Lemony Snicket books will always be odd, but, of the entire series, this book has less of an up-and-down trajectory. Instead, it's a smoother rhythm, refreshing like the calm before the storm that hits in the next book.

The truth is that troublesome things tend to remain troublesome no matter how many times you do them, & that you should avoid doing them unless they are absolutely urgent. 
"If we wait until we're ready, we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives." 
It was darker than a pitch-black panther, covered in tar, eating black licorice at the very bottom of the deepest part of the Black Sea. 
But unlike this book, the dictionary also discusses words that are far more pleasant to contemplate. The word 'bubble' is in the dictionary, for instance, as is the word 'peacock,' the word 'vacation,' and the words 'the' 'author's' 'execution' 'has' 'been' 'canceled,' which makes a sentence that is always pleasant to hear. 
Though he was not as dastardly as Esmé or Count Olaf or the hook-handed man, Jerome was still an ersatz guardian, because a real guardian is supposed to provide a home, with a place to sleep and something to wear, and all Jerome had given them in the end was "Good luck." Jerome reached the end of the block and turned left, and the Baudelaires were once again alone in the world.

There is a point at which a good person makes what can only be called an evil decision. When Jerome Squalor decides to walk away from the Baudelaires, he makes a decision that condemns them and, really, condemns himself. There are few reasons his decision could be excused, none of which he has. Instead of the ineptitude or uncaring attitude we're used to, this is a man making a purposeful decision to leave the Baudelaires on their own and unprotected.

What did you think of The Ersatz Elevator?



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